It is a rare individual who can wander, well-intentioned, into the heart of a controversial issue and manage to effectively alienate both sides.

That’s pretty much the rocky terrain I travel where issues of the environment are concerned.

The environment and its preservation or abuse seems to run as a common theme in the pages of today’s Blair Business Mirror and it’s difficult to determine if Mother Nature has held her own or taken a swift kick in the behind. The principal topics of discussion are Logan Town Centre, the Chamber’s fax network, the Indiana Bat and the tobacco industry. How much digging and imagination did it take to pull those four into the same thought process? Surprisingly, not much at all.

Logan Town Centre, as an environmental hot potato, was a slam-dunk. I recall what seems like an eternity ago, testifying on behalf of that project and being told by a young woman dressed in what appeared to be a burlap prom-dress that I was compromising the future of the county’s walleye population. After a moment of sincere reflection, the only thing that I could think to say was, “But don’t you understand? They’re bringing-in Panera Bread.”

I thought I heard Ewell Gibbons turning in his grave over that one.

I may have achieved redemption of some sort by my recent insistence that The Chamber severely reduce the use of its fax network in making members aware of upcoming programs and events. If members get less faxes, they use less paper. And less paper production means the harvesting of fewer trees. Any day now I’m expecting the Arbor Day Foundation to declare me its Man of the Year.

I guess I should mention that there’s currently legislation that’s been initiated by the Federal Communications Commission that would require that organization’s like The Chamber get the written permission of its members to continue to fax them. What a coincidence. That legislation was to take effect in July but has been postponed until January. An accelerated effort to upgrade our E-mail capabilities will hopefully present a viable alternative to the anti-faxing crowd, the membership of which has grown steadily through the years.

So the scorecard to this point reads: Joe Hurd as a threat to streams, rivers and fish – 1; Joe Hurd as an advocate for trees – ½ (Penalty deducted for questionable motive).

The Indiana Bat provides the next obstacle to my diminishing attempt at environmental serenity. It seems that a few key transportation projects in Blair County are on tentative status thanks to that furry, little mammal and The Chamber’s Transportation Committee will need to decide if a confrontation with the advocacy groups stalling those projects is prudent strategy.

Frankly, there are qualities about bats that I admire. They eat bugs. They manifest themselves only at night. And, did I mention, they eat bugs? But when they cripple highway projects that are designed to increase the safety of people and they adversely impact economic development efforts that affect the ability of people to feed, clothe and house themselves and their families, I’m willing to tolerate a few bugs. At least I think I am.

The current project to widen Route 22 at Canoe Creek and create a truck-climbing lane there is essential to a section of highway that has experienced far too many near-misses. The Indiana Bat may need to learn the hard way about the process of eminent domain and relocate elsewhere. How about Indiana?

If there’s an offsetting circumstance that I can rally to fall into some measure of good grace with environmentalists, it’s truly got to be a stretch. Maybe our newest feature entitled, “They Use Technology,” will suffice. This month we pay tribute to the technological expertise of a company – Blair Candy – that is successfully selling cigarettes at six different locations through a sister company. Since tobacco is a plant that grows in abundance in various parts of the country . . .

Nice try, huh?

In conclusion, I guess I need to conduct a few more bonding experiences with the great outdoors. For more than a half-century, I’ve been pretty much an indoor guy. I’m enthralled with the beauty of the mountains and the oceans so maybe there’s hope. I’m certainly willing to give it some thought.

On my way to Panera Bread.